Juan Discovers He’s Already Voted
“Hello?” Juan was upset. “Yes, hello?” he repeated. He'd been on the phone for over an hour and finally connected with someone who might be able to help him.
“This is Rita with Maricopa County Voter Assistance Services,” a polite yet bored-sounding voice answered him. “How may I direct your call?”
“Please,” Juan was grateful this nice lady couldn’t see the rude face he was making at her. “Please don’t ‘direct my call’ somewhere else. My name is Juan Torres, and I'm trying to figure out what happened to my mail-in ballot. It was supposed to come a long time ago.”
There was a long pause, and what sounded like typing on a keyboard. “Your first and last name, sir?”
Juan rolled his eyes and slowly said, through gritted teeth, “Juan… Torres…”
“Middle name?”
“That’s all.”
“Address?” She asked.
Juan told her his address. The questions kept coming like this. They asked for his social security number, his driver’s license number, and the number on his citizenship card.
“OK, Mr. Torres, how can I help you today?”
Juan took a deep breath. “Like I said, I’m trying to figure out what happened to my mail-in ballot. It was supposed to come a long time ago.”
“Did you request a mail-in ballot Mr. Torres?”
“Yes, several months ago.”
“Approximately when did you request your ballot, sir?” Rita asked him robotically.
Are you kidding me? Juan thought. She must be reading from a script.
“Mr. Torres?” Rita asked, “Are you still there?”
“Yes,” Juan replied. “I think it was back in February. I know it was before the primaries.”
Rita gasped softly, “Oh dear…” her words trailed off, and Juan could hear more typing. “Could you have thrown your ballot away, sir? You should have received it a long time ago.”
Juan tightened his first into a death grip that nearly broke his cell phone. He scowled maliciously at the device and considered slamming it against the wall. He took a breath and, in his most professional voice, said, “I know it should have been here a long time ago. That's why I'm calling you, to see if it’s been delivered. Also, my wife and two grown children are expecting ballots that haven't shown up. I'm sure I would remember receiving four large packages and not 'accidentally' thrown them away!”
Another long pause. “Please control your temper, Mr. Torres. Let me check and see what I can do.”
Soft music came on the line as Juan was placed on hold. He held the phone to his ear for a while and then, growing tired of that, he put the phone on speaker and set it down on his kitchen counter. It was terrible music, but the long wait gave him time to settle down.
Eventually, a man’s voice interrupted the music, “Mr. Torres? Mr. Juan Torres?”
“Yes, that’s me.”
The man cleared his throat, “Mr. Torres, my name is Stan Williams and I’m a Special Deputy Assistance at the Maricopa County Recorder’s Office.”
Juan furrowed his brows, “Is something wrong?”
“Uh, yes Mr. Torres,” Stan said weakly. “I’m sorry for having to tell you this, but according to our records, you’ve already cast your vote in the general election.”
What Does Juan Think Will Happen?
Choose Option 1: The Government is Incompetent
Choose Option 2: Somebody is Stealing Votes